May 10, 2013

Train etiquette - super simple stuff



Some people take public transport on daily basis and I happen to be one of them. Unfortunately tak semua tau maksud PUBLIC dalam public transport dan buat benda-benda yang tak sepatutnya dibuat kat tempat public.

Bila orang tegur tak bijak, marah pulak.

Sekadar nak dibuat cerita, ni aku nak terangkan the DOs and DON’Ts yang kita perlu tau bila naik public transport, specifically train.

Rapatkan saf!!!

If you are occupying a Priority Seat, vacate the seat for the needy one. Siapa yang needy ni? Orang terhad keupayaan, orang yang berusia, orang mengandung dan mereka yang bersama kanak-kanak.

Mereka yang membawa orang yang berperangai kanak-kanak tak termasuk yer kengkawan!

Girls, even if you are Ella, stop flicking your damn hair. It ain't cute at all. You might hit someone in the face with your hair!

Guys, unless you have a serious medical condition, sit with your legs closed. Do not take up more space than your one seat. Nobody is going to give you a lap dance and nobody cares about how big you are, if you know what I mean. Kalau nak tayang jugak, tunjuk jer ibu jari kaki tu, if you know what I mean…

Watch where you are walking. Nobody likes to be stepped on even if it is by accident, especially kalau diorang pakai LOUBOUTIN.

Take your rubbish out when you disembark. Jangan membuang sampah nanti orang menyampah.

Do not eat when you're on board... You're making everyone think that you are actually homeless! You're not saving any time.

Tunggu penumpang keluar dari train sebelum menaikinya. I was meant to say menaiki train. Bukan menaiki orang yang keluar dari train.

Aiyooo…

Make your way to the middle of the train dan bagi laluan kepada penumpang yang baru masuk. Jangan tunggu sampai orang ikat korang kat pintu sebab korang degil!

LOWER YOUR VOICE WHEN YOU’RE ON THE PHONE!! DO YOU TALK THAT LOUD WHEN YOU’RE AT HOME TOO? HUH? HUH?

Nose picking… no need to explain right? Euuuwww!!!

When taking a seat next to someone, jangan nak hempaskan sangat badan tu. You’re actually hitting the person next to you and they don’t appreciate it. Duduk slow-slow…

Be mindful of your umbrella, lebih-lebih lagi wet umbrella. You can do your Rihanna’s umbrella song somewhere private!

Be very aware of your body odor, bad breath, or even strong perfume. Surprisingly yes. STRONG PERFUME! Kalau korang rasa nak tuang satu botol minyak wangi, baik korang bawa tangga siap-siap. Senang nak panjat dan duduk kat bumbung train.

Keep moving when in motion. Do not stop dead in your track to think about where you want to go or what you want to cook for dinner. Step aside while you figure it out. Orang akan faham. Tak semuanya bijak dan cepat membuat keputusan. Sayangi Selangor! Eh #tetiber…

Watch out if you carry a backpack. Be aware of the space you are taking up. Do stand perfectly still if you cannot put it in between you legs. You're making everyone uneasy with your new found territory. Keep this in mind. DO YOU HAVE YOUR BACKPACK ON YOUR BACK WHENEVER YOU ARE SITTING?

You might want to turn down your Ombak Rindu on your mp3 player. If you have the tendency of playing your song out loud, without an ear-phone, be a deejay, or lock yourself in a coffin and ask someone to burry you up.

And finally, get used to the fact that trains are public transportation but it isn’t your home!

AKUBUKANSUPERMAN: I flip my hair too. Cos I am Ella… sometimes…

6 ulasan:

NUke_Rude said...

camne pulak dgn org yg ketip kuku kaki dlm tren? :(


hahahaha.

Siti said...

Bila last aku naik train ye? Lupa dah. 5,6 thn lps kot. Kat area umah aku ni apa pun takde. Usahkan train, bas rapid kl pun tak masuk. Sgt mundur. Tp ada sekali naik train, ada pulak pakwe makwe gaduh. Takde kemaluan punya org. Gaduh siap lempang terajang. Giler.

W. Hidney said...

nuke... org yg ketip kuku kaki dalam train patut beli train sendiri jer hahaha

siti... duduk mana yg terpencil sgt tu? atas gunung ledang ker?

DrMaya said...

hahaha...nice essay eh! writing. You should become the next train inspector or at least train policy maker and staple this so called notice on every subway station and train's door..make sure it is motion adverts or flash words just like the disco light..eh my English isn't as good as you are

*err...apa maksud ibu jari kaki tu? betul ker tafsiran tu? Hahahaha

shandye. said...

rasanya kalau cik kak tu mampu pakai Louboutin dia takkan naik train. ye tak?

W. Hidney said...

maya... bagus gak cadangan tu. tapi kalau i jadi policy maker, semua yang naik tren akan jadi skema hahaha. pasal ibu jari kaki tu... no komen hahaha

shandye... haha secara logiknya memang tak ler. tapi i pernah nampak sorg makcik yg pakai loud label from top to bottom kat dalam train masa kat Hong Kong dulu. and i'm not talking about fake label. acener tu? hahaha

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