AKUBUKANSUPERMAN

August 31, 2009

Choices...

In some points of our life, there will be an overpowering need for solitude. The need to isolate us from the elements that will befuddled us with choices that aren’t suppose to be chosen in the first place. The choices that may change the very course of our future life. The choices that we may regret…

I’MNOSUPERMAN: But I can’t seem to decide what is best for me. Its very annoying…

Its home...

No matter where I go,
There always be,
A very special place that calls out to me,
No matter what I do,
There always be,
A place that I can call my home.

Its different taste of life and colours,
That goes straight to my heart my soul like no other,
It’s sometime witty,

But it's safe and warm,
That no one else can change,
It will always be the same.

It’s Malaysia,
Its grass is greener,
Its land is fertile,
All the smiles are sweeter and true,
Its paradise,
Its home…

I’MNOSUPERMAN: Happy Independence Day…

August 30, 2009

Kisah glamour baju cantik

Sejuk air pancuran masih terasa. Aku menggigil lantas berlari bogel menutup suis penghawa dingin di sudut bilik.

"Nak pakai baju mana ek?" Aku berkira-kira sendiri. Hari ini adalah hari yang agak istimewa dan pastinya aku mahu tampak istimewa juga. Tanganku segera menarik sepasang baju hijau pisang yang aku tempah tahun lepas. Pasti kena dengan keronsang hitam hadiah dari ibu.

"Makan hati lah korang petang nanti haha," aku tergelak sendiri.

Suasana di Rajang Ball meriah. Ramai tetamu yang telah hadir. Ada yang sibuk menangkap gambar buat kenangan dan ada yang hanya duduk membaca menu di atas meja. Namun masing-masing kelihatan glamour dengan pakaian terbaik mereka. Dan pastinya aku salah seorang darinya. Riak!

Beduk berbunyi, menandakan telah masuk waktu berbuka. Namun belum pun sempat aku menjamah kurma yang disediakan, aku terpandang seseorang lelaki yang kelihatan terkocoh-kocoh turun dari grand stair. Bukan gaya kalutnya yang menarik perhatianku. Tetapi bajunya sama seperti bajuku. SIALAN!

I'MNOSUPERMAN: Aku tak nak tunggu lama. Lepas makan jer, aku terus keluar. Nak main dengan anak buahku; Adip. Geram!!!

August 28, 2009

Somaesthesia

When I lie in my bed at night and think over the many sins and shortcomings attributed to me, I get so confused by it all that I either laugh or cry.

Then I fall asleep with a stupid feeling of wishes to be different from what I am or from what I want to be; perhaps to behave differently from the way I want to behave or do behave. Oh heavens above, now I am getting you in a muddle too.

I'MNOSUPERMAN: Why can't it go away?

August 26, 2009

Tips kejutkan orang yang payah bangun sahur

Bangun sahur memang payah lebih-lebih lagi kalau dah memang jenis keras nak bangun pagi. Anyway, aku ada beberapa petua bagaimana nak mengejutkan orang yang payah nak bangun sahur. InsyaAllah mujarab...

1. Pegang anak jari kiri/ kanan sambil tu panggil nama dia perlahan-lahan
2. Sentuh bahu orang tidur tu dan goyangkan perlahan lahan, sambil panggil nama dia
3. Renjis air kat muka dia sambil panggil nama dia
4. Tampar-tampar manja pipi dia sambil panggil nama dia
5. Tutup kipas/ aircond

Tapi kalau still tak ada respon jugak buat macam ni...

1. Jerit nama dia kuat-kuat
2. Gigit ibu jari kaki dia macam hantu toyol gigit tu
3. Simbah air sebaldi
4. Tarik rambut dia sampai jatuh dari katil
5. Goyang badan dia kuat-kuat dan jerit “Gempa bumi! Gempa bumi!”

Masih jugak tak ada respon buat macam ni...

1. Pergi kat telinga dia then sebut “Maa rabbuka!” sambil seru nama dia banyak kali...
2. Pergi kat dia, baca jer surah Yaasin....

Tapi kalau still tak ada respon jugak, ni je la cara terakhir. Panggil jer orang masjid/ surau untuk uruskan, kerana Tuhan lebih menyayanginya...

I’MNOSUPERMAN: Selamat berpuasa, berbuaka puasa, dan bersahur...

August 25, 2009

Aku geram!

Jam dah menunjukkan pukul 4 petang. Dokumen yang diminta pejabat Kuala Lumpur sepatutnya di faks pukul 3.30 petang tadi. Managerku dah bising-bising. Admin Officer pula buat-buat tak tahu. Mesin faks degil dan meragam, macam haram. Aku tambah bengang.

Bammm!!! Mesin faks jatuh ke lantai. Managerku terkedu di kerusinya. Admin Officer mula buat-buat sibuk. Puas hati aku. Barang rosak tak sepatutnya disimpan. Buat membazir bil elektrik jer!

"Write a purchase order for a new fax machine ya. I think we need a new one." arah managerku kepada Admin Officer. Suaranya antara dengar dan tak dengar.


I'MNOSUPERMAN: Orang kata bila terhantuk baru nak tergadah. Tapi kalau tak tergadah jugak, aku boleh jer hantukkan kepala kau kat dinding.

Baik jangan pakai!

Tempohari aku ke bazaar Ramadhan di town, memburu juadah buat sajian sahur. Walaupun tak semeriah tahun-tahun lepas, ramai jugak yang datang. Kertu, muda, bagak, genit, meletups, suam-suam kuku, panjang, lonjong, asli, ciplak, persis model, tiang lampu, lurus dan bengkok.

Dalam ramai-ramai umat yang ada tu, aku terlihat sekumpulan budak-budak yang ranggi berseluar jeans ketat dan berkaca mata hitam. Dan diorang memakai penutup hidung dan mulut. Syabas! Ada kesedaran untuk menjaga kesihatan disitu. Tapi sayang, penutup hidung dan mulut tu hanya sekadar tersangkut menutup dagu. Lagi bagus kalau tidak dipakai in the first place. Buat semak jer. Adik... Abang nak pesan. Kalau malu nak pakai, baik jangan pakai terus. Lagi satu, kat mana adik beli jeans tu? Cun lah!

I’MNOSUPERMAN: Alang-alang menyeluk perkasam, biar sampai ke pangkal lengan. Alang-alang memakai mask, biar dipakai dengan betul!

August 24, 2009

Problems

Dear diary,

Everyone close to me seems to have a lot of problems nowadays and that's affecting me in many ways.

Some of them are breaking up from their relationship due to miscommunications and distance. Some of them are loosing their job due to some small mistakes that they should be able to avoid. And some are having second thoughts on everything that had happen in their life.

It’s painful to hear them cry over the phone as I cannot offer much except for some soothing words. I rather be there and hug them while they cried on my shoulder. Its better that way...

Life can be very cruel sometime. It gives us problems that will pull us down and making us do stupid things like boozing up and taking drugs just to calm ourselves down. In the worst case scenario, we will start to curse our own life and basically regretted every bit of it.

But looking back life is not that bad after all. We will not be what we are today if we never bruised ourselves from one of many football matches we have when we were young. We will never be good in math if our teachers didn't rotan us for not able to finish our homework. Life is a one way journey of ups and downs. We just have to keep on walking and improve our steps as we go.

Yours truly,
W. Hidney

August 22, 2009

Of me and A H1N1

My head is spinning and my body is aching. My throat is killing me and I keep on going to the toilet...

Initially I thought I had a normal fever. A normal I-ran-in-the-rain-and-then-I-caught-a-fever fever. So I was not worried. But I felt like a C4 has just exploded on my face after Doctor Patrick diagnosed me with an H1N1 sickness. "Am I dying?"

I soon find myself in this room, deserted from the rest of the world with nothing much to nag on. Just me and my Anne Frank's The Diary of a Young Girl. What are the odds that I am having a similar situation as Anne Frank right now? Locked in a small room, away from everyone, waiting for the world to heal. In my case, waiting for me to heal myself.

3 days have gone. I wonder what its like to see the birds flying again...

I’MNOSUPERMAN: …...

August 17, 2009

Tag Chime

Berikut adalah tag yang diberikan oleh En. Chime. Layan…

Anda adalah?
…Seorang planter yang tak boleh makan nenas!

Pendapat anda tentang.
Handphone -My center of universe! Satu-satunya gadget yang aku tak boleh lepas jauh-jauh. It’s my communication gadget, my office, my internet, my walkman, my radio, my camera, my wife! Aku paling suka kalau orang tenung my handphone dan tanya, “Handphone jenama apa ni Hidney? Tak pernah nampak pun!”

Camera Digital -Dulu pernah ada satu, owh actually ada dua; Sony dan BenQ. Lepas dapat bonus, aku beli DSLR Olympus. I like to take pictures you see. Aku akan bingkaikan mana-mana gambar yang menarik. Ada juga yang aku hadiahkan untuk member-member.

Buku/majalah -Aku adalah ulat buku. Antara lain yang ada dalam koleksiku adalah novel (bukan dari kategori meleleh), travel guides, autobiografi dan ensiklopedia. Banyak yang boleh kita pelajari dari membaca. Perkara yang tidak diajar di dalam kelas atau ditonton di kaca tv. Aku suka seseorang yang bijak.

Hobi memancing -Suatu hobi yang memerlukan kesabaran dan aku bukanlah seorang yang penyabar.

Modelling -Oh tidak. AKU TAK LAYAK!

Kenderaan anda?
Currently I am driving a white Hyundai Getz. Warna asalnya hijau, tapi aku tukar jadi warna hitam. Hijau bukan warna kegemaranku. Lagipun Getz hijau nampak agak feminim if you know what I mean. Memandangkan aku akan berpindah ke Kelantan dalam beberapa bulan ni, yang memerlukan aku untuk berjiwa suci dan bersih, aku tukar warna keretaku menjadi putih LOL.

Hobi anda?
Pastinya membaca. Kemudian tangkap-tangkap gambar dan duduk berangan.

Aktiviti sampingan anda?

Diluar waktu kerja, aku biasanya menghabiskan masaku di padang golf. Kalau tak pun, aku akan buat workout di gym dan tengok awek mandi kolam. Hahaha kantoi!!!

Aktiviti utama anda?
Menternak kelapa sawit!

Anda seorang pemarah?
Oh yes. Aku suka soalan ni. Kalau nak tahu betapa garangnya aku, silalah datang melawat pejabatku pada pukul 3.30 petang setiap hari, kecuali hujung minggu. Jangan lupa buat-buat muka kerek. Pasti anda akan mendapat.

Sekiranya anda sorang wanita?
Aku akan belajar tukar tayar kereta, belajar tentang enjin kereta, bermain main bola sepak dan panjat pokok kelapa.

Anda Romantik?
Pada dia yang satu… hehe.

Anda punya gambar yang anda anggap romantik? Masukkan di sini dan jelaskan kenapa?
Hambeek!!! No apparent reason as to why I like this picture. I don’t randomly show my romantic side.

Lapar?
Sekarang? Agak la…

Mengantuk?
Sekarang? Boleh la…

Gembira?
Sekarang? Sudah semestinya…

Sedih?
Sekarang? Sikit-sikit…

Lepas ni nak ke mana?
Tak ke mana pun. Kena duduk berkurung kat rumah sebab demam.

Sebarkan kepada 6 orang mangsa berikutnya...
Tak nak tag siapa-siapa…

Mind your language!!!

I have one adorable friend. His name is Mike. We went to gym together and he is basically my trainer. One day I’ve promised to hit the gym with him but I have to cancel it. He was not happy with the last minute cancellation.

"I waited 2 hours for you. Where you been?" he said.

"Sorry la. I got some errand to attend to." I replied.

"I am really mad FOR you right now!"

"Aww I don't know that you were really mad FOR me Mike. You really go head over heels for me eih?"

"Yes!"

"So when are you going to propose?"


"What propose?" he seemed to be confused.

"You said you are mad FOR me. So I wonder when will you ask me to marry you." I explained.

"Clever la tu. I am very mad AT you la babi!"

So the moral of the story is, be very careful with what you said. Cos people might took you differently.

I'MNOSUPERMAN: It’s amazing how such small word can change the meaning of the whole sentence. English can be very weird sometime...

August 16, 2009

Of a farm and an adobe

It’s very ‘in’ right now in Facebook and I am addicted to it. It’s the Farmville. A place where you can plant some veggies and you can occasionally adopt a black sheep into your farm… well literally. Try lah. And don't forget to add me as your neighbour.

I’ve been learning some new tricks in Adobe Photoshop lately. Yeah yeah yeah, it’s nothing monumental but at least I am improving myself. I've changed the banner... yet again and this time it will stay a little bit longer compared to the previous one. Owh yes… the little orange thing on the left with some killer quotes is coming back. Perhaps we can learn something from it. Enjoice!

I’MNOSUPERMAN: I am watching Sepet and Gubra on Channel 110 over and over again. Syiok banar bah.

August 15, 2009

Tekad

Perjalanan kehidupan
Di kiri kanan dugaan cabaran
Keseorangan menempuh ujian
Meneruskan perjuangan

Usah putus asa
Kelak kau berjaya
Membela nasibmu
Masamu kan tiba


Keimanan keyakinan
Sinar cahaya penunjuk haluan
Walaupun payah kau harus tabah
Demi mencapai segala impian


I'MNOSUPERMAN: I'll be your strength...

August 11, 2009

Bad combo

The last time I went back to my hometown Mukah, the road was bad. Being positive that the road should be ok by now, I drove my just-recently-discharged-from-the workshop-car to Mukah and boy that was the stupidest decision I have ever made. The road was even worst than before. I spent almost 2 hours driving and cursing the government on a 56km strip of road between Selangau and Balingian. What the hell? Rakyat didahulukan pencapaian diutamakan my foot! Baaaaaabi...

Already annoyed with the road condition and the stupid government, I saw hectares and hectares of land being burnt down to give way for the so called migratory farming system along the roadside. Suddenly I felt relieved. These stupid people have chosen this stupid government to govern them and this stupid government is so stupid that he cannot perform his duty to stop this stupid people from deliberately burning the whole state down! When will they stop and learn? Can’t they see the weather is becoming sickening and heat is becoming unbearable? Urghh... They wouldn't understand it anyway cos they are too busy arguing who belong to which land and rubbing their superior's balls!!!

Later!

I'MNOSUPERMAN: Happy Independence Day BOLEHland...

August 8, 2009

Pesta layang-layang Bintulu

Jerebu, panas, sesak, manusia bangang, manusia bengong, bayi meragam, budak menggila… tak lalu aku nak berlama-lama di tapak pesta. Cukup sekadar melihat ke langit, bersaji mata dengan layang-layang aneh dan pelik.

“Beli layang-layang bang.” Aku tak lalu…

“Beli baju pesta bang.” Aku tak mahu…

“Keropok lekor bang.” Aku beli 2 bungkus untuk aku ratah dalam perjalanan pulang.

I’MNOSUPERMAN: Mungkin tahun depan akan lebih meriah. HENTIKAN PEMBAKARAN TERBUKA!!!

August 4, 2009

My genius workers

I was doing my routine site visit the other day when I discovered how astonishingly creative my workers can be. In case you were wondering, it’s a packet of instant noodle filled with water and cooked over an open flame. Why can’t I think of it before?

I’MNOSUPERMAN: What else can they do?

August 3, 2009

Daddy's little boy

It’s now white and it’s sweet.
It’s my Getz and I love it.

“Daddy promise daddy will take a good care of you. Daddy will not drive you into tree or lamp post anymore. Daddy promise...”

I’MNOSUPERMAN: Daddy misses you...
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